Clinical Story 1
“I miss how you looked before, but more, I miss how we used to spend time together.”
(The story of Mark)
Elena:
Dr. Stein, before we close this chapter, could you share a story that reflects what we’ve discussed today?
Dr. Stein:
Of course. Let me tell you about Mark.
Mark was in his late twenties. His symptoms had stabilized, and from a clinical perspective, things were going well. But he stopped meeting friends, avoided social events, and declined invitations.
When I asked him why, he hesitated at first. Then he said:
“I don’t feel like myself anymore.” He hesitated before saying it, as if unsure whether it sounded superficial or important enough to mention.
Over the past year, he had gained weight. His energy was lower. But what affected him most was how he saw himself.
“I don’t think anyone would find me attractive now,” he said.
He also admitted, almost as an afterthought:
“I feel like people notice it immediately… even if they probably don’t.”
His partner, however, saw things differently. She told him:
“I miss how you looked before, but more, I miss how we used to spend time together.”
That changed something.
They didn’t start with big plans. Just short walks. Then shared meals. Then small routines.
Over time, Mark didn’t just regain physical strength; he regained confidence.
Not because everything changed quickly, but because he began to feel present again in his own life and relationship.
Clinical Story 2
“Feeling Seen Again”
(The story of Anna)
Elena:
And perhaps an example from a woman’s perspective?
Dr. Stein:
Yes, gladly. I remember Anna.
Anna was in her early thirties. She was thoughtful, reflective, and deeply cared about relationships. But after a period of illness and physical changes, she withdrew.
She once said:
“I feel like people only see the illness… or the changes. Not me.” She paused after saying it, as if weighing whether she was being too harsh, or simply honest.
What affected her most was not the physical change itself, but the feeling of losing her identity as a woman, as a partner.
With time, and with gentle support, something shifted.
Her partner began to focus less on “fixing things” and more on simply being present.
He would say:
“I like spending time with you. That hasn’t changed.”
They started doing small things together, cooking, watching films, and talking without pressure.
Gradually, Anna began to feel seen again, not as a diagnosis, not as a body that changed, but as a person.
And with that, her confidence slowly returned.
Final reflection
Elena:
What I take from today is that intimacy is shaped not only by emotions, but also by how someone feels in their own body.
Dr. Stein:
Exactly. When people begin to feel a bit more comfortable in themselves again, physically and emotionally, it often opens the door to reconnecting with others.
These changes don’t have to be dramatic. Often, they begin with small moments:
a shared routine, a sense of being understood, or simply feeling less alone. Not always consistently, and not always in a straight line.
And over time, those moments can grow into something more stable and meaningful.
Elena:
In our next chapter, we will continue this conversation by exploring how treatment can influence intimacy, and how these choices can be discussed openly and thoughtfully.
Until then, take care, and we look forward to being with you again.
